I'm annoyed at my own behavior.

A few years ago, a very close girl friend of mine, got very irritated with me. There were several issues compounding her irritation, but one that seemed rather petty to me at the time, is now coming back to bite me in the karmic bum. My friend told me that when we were spending time together, I was rarely present because I was so glued to my phone. I remember being defensive about her calling me out on this, because it was so true. There was a time in my life not to long ago, when I was utterly consumed by whomever may be trying to get a hold of me at any minute of the day. The irony of this, was that the person I was so concerned about turned out to be a fool and mostly a waste of my time, and my friend who wanted to spend more intentional and quality time with me has since moved across the country.

I am far from being disconnected from my phone, and I find myself still rushing to it after I've been away from it for an extended amount of time, but what I am noticing, is that I am taking offense to when I am wanting to spend quality time with people and they are attempting to have a conversation with me and texting other people at the same time. Now to be honest, I am still guilty of this behavior too, and I'm ready to change it. I tend to think that my time is precious and the people I choose to spend time with most likely feel the same way, and what I am realizing, is that I find it extremely rude when people don't value my time or my presence.

When I am spending time with someone, I have made a conscious choice to be with that person at that time and it is important for me to make the most of every minute that I choose to spend with loved ones and friends. I love making making people feel special, and at the end of the day I want to feel special too. When I am either texting someone, or taking insignificant phone calls while interrupting a real person-to-person interaction I am being rude and disrespectful. Being rude and disrespectful are two qualities that I am not ok with giving or receiving.

So how do I proceed? Of course there are going to be times when it is important to respond to a phone call or a text, but what I have found to be true is that 95% of the phone calls, texts, and emails, I receive can wait a little bit, if not for a a while. My intention is to be present while engaging in person-to-person interactions because it is important to me to connect with the people who take the time to be with me. I cannot change other people's behavior, I can only change my own, so when I find myself feeling like whomever I'm with is being rude or disrespectful to me, I have the choice to either say nothing, or speak up and share how I am feeling.

Here are some questions and thoughts that have come up around this issue for me:

What makes interaction with one person more important that an other?

Is a casual text conversation really that important?

How can I make the people in my life feel appreciated and special when I am with them?

Can I ask the people in my life who really only communicate with me on the phone to only call/text me at specific times?

What would it be like to turn my phone off for a set amount of time every day?

Now obviously this is an issue I am working with, I'm sure anyone with a phone experiences this to some extent, but I am curious, what behaviors do you take offense to that you actually perpetuate too?

I haven't been blogging for a while, and it feels good to be back.

Say hi, and have a great week!

Talia